Congratulations to My Graduate!

It is so amazing how a dream can come true. For over a year now, I have dreamed of  Fred graduating from college. I was there with two children. One was Bug and the other was an almost one year old I never saw the sex of the one I was carrying. I was in perfect shape with well defined arms and a fitted purple dress with a black belt and black shoes. My hair was natural with shiny curls and my make-up was perfect... 


I have been extremely busy. Not very productive, just busy. I didn't take the time to look for a dress. I hate looking for anything when I am overweight. So, I asked God to help me. I just explained my situation to him. I cast the care of my outward appearance and gave it to Him. Friday, I went inside the boutique and found the perfect purple dress. Okay, it fits well. It looks good. So, now Lord, I need some shoes. Because my feet are large, it is difficult at times to find shoes that are my size, but I went into the second shoe store and "BAM!" the perfect pair of shoes to go with the dress. So my dream became a reality. Just as I saw it (minus the part about me being in perfect shape). But this is not about me I began to think. I just want to look my best  for Frederick 's big day.

So, Saturday was an awesome day. Frederick graduated from Ole Miss with his Bachelor's in Business Administration with a concentration on Human Resources. I have never been so proud of him. He was extremely proud of himself. The excitement that he displayed was beautiful. He didn't even sleep Friday night. He got out of the bed at about 3 am and I got out of bed to help him calm his nerves. He really liked my dress. I am so glad he did. God picked it out for me.

Hearing his name as he walked across the stage, was the best part. Watching him smile as he shook the hand of the Dean of the Business School. Congratulations, Fred. Welcome to Rebelville....Hotty Toddy!

In My Element

Man O Man, I went to a wonderful meeting yesterday with like-minded people. People who are interested in business, health and wellness. Published authors,columnist and motivational speakers. WOW! It was the best thing I'd been to in a while. It was a great refresher for my own motivation to become a more productive person as a whole. I was so in my element. The event inspired me to continue my writings that I had put on hold due to being in the wrong thing for so long.
I am an individual. I am an innovator. I am a leader and not a follower. It has been so clear for so long what I need to do with my health, family and business. I let go of my vision...I couldn't see past my current situation. But even though it has been a rough calendar year emotionally. I have had a REAL TRUE pick-me-up. I am heading in a new and free direction. I am calling my OWN shots. I am getting my validation from God, my husband and my two children. I don't have to dance to anyone's music, especially when they don't have my best interest in mind. I love it and I thank God for every trial this year, every affliction, every eye-opening experience. It has lead me back to myself. Back to motivation-Back to truthfulness-Back to encouragement, Back to accomplished. So although I have said it 100 times this year, I am back in my element.  As indicated in Matthew 6:34, don't worry about anything! Watch Out world!

Sidebar: Today, I went to the department store and literally stocked up on clothes. I have been punishing myself for the last year for not keeping my promise to myself. I was being very unforgiving. After reading my Bible and committing to positive confessions, my faith has again strengthened. What I must remember is not to let the cares of this World rob me of success. I have been listening to the Holy Spirit and receiving help and strength from him. But I am thankful for this drought. Thankful for this time of reflection and time to see what things are REALLY about.  I am thankful for understanding what my motives were really about when it related to me. Validation! I was at a standstill for four years waiting on someone to tell me to move in the right direction. It wasn't until my son's daycare teacher asked me, " what are you waiting on?" I couldn't answer her. I guess I am waiting on someone to tell me to move, but God already told me to move years ago. So, I have made some changes. All stressful, unproductive, & binding committments have been eliminated. I am free for change, in my body, mind and spirit. My Element!

STILL RECEIVING HELP, AGAIN

I am up this morning. I have decided to write instead of doing any of my other morning activities. I have a lot on my mind so...just let me vent. Thanks world.

I learned yesterday not to take on too much, how to make things more simple. I heard a teaching on the story of Moses and how he had to learn to delegate once he began working for his father-in-law. He tried to do everything himself. He would do things just because people asked him to, not considering what he had to do himself or what would be more important than the thing you agreed to do for someone else. SELAH! Isn't the bible amazing! The word of God is so practical. It actually has an example of EVERYTHING and a solution. It is definitely the key to life. ONE thing I have to remember to do is GO TO THE BIBLE FIRST AND NOT AFTER THE ERRORS HAVE BEEN MADE. I would save myself a lot of time. For me, I seem to hear a whole lot better after I have bumped my "hard head". To get me to listen to anyone once I have set my mind on something is a heck of a challenge. This characteristic has been a good thing at times and a horrible thing at other times.

I am STILL working on some things: 1.) saying, No,  2.) letting people help me and 3.) Having the courage to not give up.  I have times when I get really discouraged when it comes to Lil Fred and his communication. Every time, I see a younger kid that is further along in his communication than Bug, I just get so upset. All these emotions: anger, sadness, confusion, denial and even betrayal. I realize this situation has turned my life up side down: some for the good, but in some ways has made living a bit difficult. I cast the care, but I keep picking it back up. I keep holding on to it wanting to fix it myself. What can I do? I'll try this...or I'll try that. Maybe I can buy this or that. Then, I see God standing there waiting to take the worry back from me, waiting to take the burden, waiting to sort it all out for me. I then with hesitation, I give it back to Him, 'cause I will again realize that I can't fix it. Only He can. So here...my Lord...take it back. Help me to trust you to take care of Lil Fred.

Side step:  I had a meeting with a computer programmer, IT (whatever that means, I think Internet technician...who knows. I need to look that up) and website designer yesterday. The meeting was a bit strange, because about seven or eight years ago, I had a different association with this man. He came to assist me with some changes that are about to take place as far as business is concerned. As he explained things, it was a bit difficult at first. I just assumed I needed a little bit of this and a few more of that. But once I told him what I want and he explained everything...and I was able to turn it around into terms that I could relate to (I related everything to housing, real estate, and interior designing). I now realize that I was living in the ghetto, Section 8 as it relates to the choices that I have made related to technology. It was a GREAT meeting. Well worth the time.

I had better get ready to start the day....I'll write a little later.  Thanks for listening.