After Thanksgiving

If I had to grade myself for yesterday. I would give myself a C+. I ate pretty good, but I tasted a little of everything at three homes. WOW!!! BUT, I did much better this Thanksgiving than last year. '

....I didn't go shopping this morning. I went to the gym, jogged 3 miles and elliptical training for 30 minutes. After that, Fred, Bug and I went to Wal-Mart to buy juice. We just felt like we have all we need.  We don't need any electronics or anything that was on sale. So we chose not to fight the crowd this morning.

I really want to go to the casino with my cousins tonight. The ones that came in from Nashville and St. Louis are meeting at the Isle of Capri in Lula, MS. It is an hour drive from me and they are not meeting until 8:30. We don't have a babysitter and Fred is tired. Looks like I will be staying at home this time. I guess I'll hang out next time.

Tomorrow the TNT run is four miles in distance. We will be meeting at Shelby Farms again. I am quite sure that I will be one of the very few that will be running tomorrow.That reminds me, I'd better check my email to make sure that we are still running tomorrow.

Well, I'll write tomorrow to let you know how the run went. Night-Night. 

My current transition style

Today, I was preparing for Thanksgiving as I mentioned in the previous blog, but I was also thinking about my hair. Yesterday, I took the wig out. My hairdresser sewed in a wig and because I sweat and exercise everyday.....it itched like crazy. So, I took it out and was in a great crisis. Now that I am transitioning to natural hair, I have two different hair textures and I have difficulty trying to manage it. So she (my hair stylist) called me today and suggested that I do the "big chop" or get some braids if I feel that I don't have the desired new growth length.

She was right. I don't know much about braids. I have had them one time in my life and it was a horrible experience for me, so I was a little hesitant, but She is so right!!! Braiding is what is going to get me to the length that I desire while still looking presentable to my clients and family.

Here is a picture:

The Weigh In, and Thanksgiving preparations

I still lost weight. Can you believe it? After taking a break from my plan, I still lost weight. The meeting was about being assertive without being rude during family meals. People try to offer food and tell you that you don't need to lose any weight. We just talked about some ways to deal with these types of challenges during the holiday season. It was a great class. My work out this morning and yesterday morning was especially good. I don't know exactly why. Maybe I had a different frame of mind. I felt like I had included God in what I was doing. It was as if I was taking care of my body to honor Him. I felt so free. I have also been including Him in all of my meals. I pray to God before every meal, even my snacks. This is a new habit that I am developing so it is not perfected but it is definitely in the works.

Today, I am going to go to the grocery store and get the ingredients for our Thanksgiving meal that we are going to have at home. I plan on making lots of great tasting veggies and healthy desserts.

Fast, Thanksgiving Plan

Well, I took the days off from the plan..a vacation from my eating plan. Ate too much and then fasted on Sunday. I gave the day to the Lord and prayed for discipline and endurance. I listened to inspirational  CDs on discipline and self control. Like I stated Saturday, I am not a fan of eating out of control. It doesn't please me like it did before. I think I may have gained a little weight due to my "diet vacation". I am not worried about that. I am excited about having a good week with my family as the Thanksgiving holiday approaches.

Fred always wants to have a meal at our home to eat once we have eaten at our relatives homes. I hope he understands that our "at home" meal is going to be very different. Lower in calories and lower in fat.

Well, I go weigh in tomorrow, but I am going to focus on what I can learn from the meeting and not on the scale. I'll let you know how it goes.

Weigh In, Taking a break

I am still losing weight. Even though, I haven't been 100% on my eating plan. Tuesdays weigh in resulted in a 44 pound loss. I am so glad that I am losing still even though I feel like I am not doing as well as I have in the past. I spoke to the leader about my feelings. I let her know that I am a little tired of doing what I am doing. Even though I am losing weight and people are complimenting me. I still have come to a point where the "honeymoon" of it all and the excitement of it all is fading. I am truly starting to see that this is something that I will have to do whether I feel like it or not. It is hard not to be driving by your feelings, but to be successful I am going to have to put my feelings aside and do what I know that I am supposed to do. Well anyway, my leader suggested that I take a break from dieting.....she emphasized not going overboard but just to take a break. Well that is exactly what I did!!! Wednesday, Thursday and Friday of this week I took a break. Of course I didn't eat as much as I would have when I first started but I ate some things that I haven't eaten in six months. I continued to exercise. I have to do that. Oh how I wish I was as excited about eating right as I am about exercise. Things would be so easy then. Well, I feel like crap. I feel like a big trash can filled with junk. So much for taking a break. ITS NOT WORTH IT!!! I thought I was missing out on something. NO! NO! I haven't felt this sick or full in months. I won't do it again. Falling of the horse one day is one thing, But falling off for three days has not been fun. I like eating healthy. I will continue to do it from now on no matter how I feel.

I am on my way to our third TNT training session. We are going to run 3 miles this morning. Once I return, I am going to purge some of the old clothes in my closet, do my workout schedule and my eating plan for next week (including Thanksgiving Day) My goal is to have control on this day too. I don't want to gain weight. I will reach a weight of 180 pounds by December 31st. Nothing will stop me from reaching that. Of course I will allow myself to have some of the food during the holidays, but one plate, one serving is my motto.

Doctor's Visit and the plateau

I went to the doctor for a check up and a refill on my thyroid medication yesterday. The physician was very pleased with my progress. My BMI has decreased since my first visit in February from 34.4 to 30.0. I asked her how much did she think I should way at my height and frame. She told me a good goal for me is about 160 pounds. This was my original goal. We actually agree on my goal. The doctor continued to praise me for my efforts. At the same time she was telling me how great I am doing, I was feeling as if I couldn't go on any more. I guess I am at a plateau. I am going to my weight management meeting today. I plan on reviewing my goal weight with the leader.

As I am on vacation this week, I am going to make a schedule for myself that will include actual exercises for strength training and cardio. A schedule similar to my meal plan. This schedule will include cleaning my home, spending time with God, working out and family time. Everything will be scheduled. That's the way that I am able to stay on track. I have attempted this several times, but I haven't scheduled time with God or scheduled exact exercises for various body parts. What works for me is scheduling.

My mother-in-law asked for some meal ideas to enhance her eating plan. I was supposed to do it last night, but I didn't get around to it today. I will definitely do it today. I was excited to be able to help her get her healthy goals established.

Well, I am on my way to the meeting. I will let you know what I learn. I know that I haven't lost any weight, but I am still working toward a change. Maybe when I attend this meeting, I will gain a little more motivation to stay in it.

Getting on the Wagon and Staying On Wagon with a seatbelt

Yesterday's run was a lot of fun. Running in a group is so motivating. We talked and laughed the whole four miles. After the run, we had a clinic (an educational workshop about running topics) on running gear and race preparation gagets. I was a little overwhelmed. I really was unable to determine what I really need and what I don't. It is so much to take in. I must say that I didn't realize that running was such a science. There is a lot to the body when it is preparing for long distance runs. The running outfit that Fred and I purchased at the Nike Clearance Store was perfect. It was exactly what the owner of the running store was showing us. I got mine at a fraction of the cost. Running material is expensive, but after listening to the "science" behind the material and design of the running clothing. I understand why it costs what it does.

I am still in the process of transitioning to natural hair. I have not relaxed since September. I am excited because I can see a small amount of new growth. This week I am on vacation.( Fred and I are not leaving the city, but we both have taken the week off to get some much needed rest.) I am going to get a sew-in. I want a sew in that looks natural. My hair stylist and I are going to the beauty supply store to find some styles that will work for me.  Wednesday of this week is the big day. That's when my new look will emerge.

Yesterday, we went to a classmate of my son's birthday party. I ate pizza and cake. Then we went to a Grizzlies basketball game and I ate at the game as well. I don't overeat often, but when I taste just a little bit of forbidden food it sets me off. It's like I lose all control. I don't care how much hard work I put into myself, when I allow myself to eat junk, I can't manage to get a grip.

Today, I attended the church that I have been attending. The pastor preached on getting physically fit as well as spiritually fit. It was just what I needed to hear. He supported his message with the same scriptures that I have been reading and meditating. Fred got a chance to go with me, and he stated that the message hit home with him as well. We all need to do a better job of being the best we can be. I have gotten better, but I still have major areas of weakness (procrastination, laziness, inconsistency, low self-esteem and unforgiveness) I have gotten better in all of these areas, but my weakness in these areas have caused me to seek fulfillment. I have replaced the need for God and His love with the desire for food. I haven't taken the time to make a schedule for spending time with God. Don't get me wrong, I have made great progress. I have lost a lot of weight and I feel better about myself, I am able to do more now that I could this time last year because of my increased energy level. All this being said, I know that if I don't get this overeating together, I won't enjoy this freedom from food for long. I have got to get these days of mindless eatting and binge moments behind me. My submission to God will get me there. My meditation on scriptures, the putting thoughts of God and his goodness above the thought of  'what am i gonna eat next' will help me get to my goal weight and maintain it.

Tomorrow's exciting Run

Tomorrow, we (TNT) are meeting at fleet feet to run 4 miles and then shop the store for the required clothing for great runs. Tonight, Fred took me to the Nike Clearance store in Whitehaven to find some running tights at a price that Mia Cole will pay. The regular price for a pair costs about $70. I was able to purchase a pair tonight for $14.99.

I went to TGI Fridays with Erica (my office assistant). I ate 1/2 of a Turkey burger and a side salad with vinegar dressing. She at a regular entree. I DID NOT FEEL DEPRIVED!!! Can you believe that! I was not deprived. I was satisfied with my meal. This is a great feeling. Its a feeling of freedom.

Sick Bug II

Because Bug is still under the weather, Fred (husband) and I had to tag team going to work today. He worked the first part of the day and then I went to my job the second part of the day. I was able to drive to Memphis and weigh in. I lost 2.6 pounds. Yeah me.

While at home, one of my old clients' mother was going to visit me at the office, but I could be there because of Bug. We talked on the phone for about 30 minutes. She gave me tons of advise about healthy eating, managing a family and workouts. The major thing I drew from the conversation was her statement that she lost motivation. How do I make sure that I don't lose that??? Write new goals, keep doing what I am doing now.....

I went 6 days without eating a snack after dinner. I loved that success. Tonight, since I did so well by avoiding snacks after dinner, I ate 1 serving of ginger snaps. It set me off!! I ate the ginger snaps, then sun chips, then a small, small serving of oreo ice-cream. That says it all. I know for sure now that I can't handle processed snacks. Only fruits and healthy snacks after dinner. I still did better than I usually do.

Sick Bug

Bug is still not feeling well, so I decided to cancel my morning appointments and keep him. Its times like these when we wish we had close family members. Because I am self-employed, when I don't work, I don't get paid. Anyway, he seems to be doing better, but I didn't want to send him to school today with diarrhea.

I will probably have to go to my weight management meeting tonight seeing that Bug has an evaluation tomorrow at my usual meeting time.

I was able to begin the first day of my individual training for the marathon. I jogged two miles and completed two miles on the elliptical trainer. I will complete the strength training tonight. I want to try some strength training classes. These are not offered at my gym. I also want to do spinning and swimming to add more variety to my workouts. Maybe since Bug and I are just at the house we could check the place out.

I looked at some old pictures yesterday of me during my yo-yo diet years in college and graduate school. I believe that I have lost over two hundred pounds if you count all of the weight I have lost over countless diets. Thank God for deliverance. I'm finally free.

Trip to Oxford

I am so disappointed that I couldn't go to church. As I sit here, as the church service is going on, I wonder what I am missing. What is the pastor preaching about that would help me in stay faithful to my healthy life. Buggie threw-up all night last night. Even though he seems to be doing better, I don't want to go to church and then he throws up all over the pews. Well, I will read my daily proverbs and look at writing some more inspirational scriptures for my gym readings.

Oh, I forgot to post for yesterday's run with the Team in Training. Well, our first run was 3.5 miles. We ran at Shelby Farms park in Shelby county, TN in Memphis. I have been there several times, but not with the eyes that I have now. The park is beautiful. As I ran with the team, I noticed the beauty of God's creations. The life in the trees, leaves, bison, birds, the grass and the ponds. I saw Him in everything. It reminded me of His stability. Where I am inconsistent, Him living in me gives me the power to be consistent. Just as he is consistent and faithful to the trees, bison, leaves, grass, birds, he is consistent with me, He is faithful to me, He will always be there to help me. Always.

My fellow team members all are excited and encouraging. We spent time getting to know each other. I feel like completing the marathon is the goal that I will attempt to reach. This was due to the encouragement of another team member. She suggested that I train with the full marathon runners and if I feel that I want to change we can go down to the 1/2 marathon training. I agreed to this with her as we both are first time marathon runners.

Yesterday, we also went to Oxford where I saw my long time friend from college, Tameshia and the rest of my in laws. Tameshia looks great. She is a fellow speech-language pathologist who has managed to lose weight and keep it off by recognizing her need to be healthy. It was great seeing her. She is such an inspiratin to me. I was greeted with tons of compliments on my weight loss. Everyone was telling me how great I looked. With that came tons of excuses for why they aren't doing what they need to to be healthy. I heard the words "Lose weight". Everyone was saying "I want to lose weight", "I need to lose weight". The need to lose weight can't be your focus for attaining a healthy life. That is where I went wrong the hundreds of times, I set out to lose weight. Once I get there...to my goal or near my goal and the weight wasn't my "reward" anymore, I lost focus. I lost the drive to continue...because I had the wrong reason as my driving force.  You've got to purpose in your heart to be healthy for God. Your purpose has to be to serve Him. To have others look at you and see God's discipline and self-control working in your life. That's the reason for long term weight management success. That's it. That's the bottom line. Anything outside of that is not permanent and won't last.

The Future and future pregnancy

Another hurdle. Today, I was a little anxious about the future. I know....I know...just keep your mind on today. I know that, but I have to be honest and say that I am a little nervous about having to gain weight for my next pregnancy. We are planning to extend our family some time after finishing the marathon in April. Just the thought of gaining weight during pregnancy after I have worked so hard to get it off makes me a little nervous...okay a lot nervous. Is there anyone who has managed to continue their exercise and healthy diet during pregnancy? I don't know anyone who has. 


 

Minus 40lbs

I have been dancing around a forty pound loss for the last three weeks. I would gain 2 then lose 2. But today I weighed in with a 40 lb loss. I am officially at my half way mark. I am very proud of myself.

My husband made a comment today that really made an impression on me. He said, "I can't wait until exercise comes automatic like it does for you". A statement like that was really refreshing to hear. I am glad that my husband noticed how important exercise it to me.

The kick off to the LLS Team in Training is this Saturday. I can hardly wait. I am so excited that I am finally working toward one of my health goals....completing a marathon.

Thanks be to God for giving me the tools to be successful in my quest to be healthy.