What a busy day! Here it is 1:43am and I just finished stuffing the stockings and I took my dressing out of the oven. I am so excited. My poor kitty cat didn't get much in her stocking this year. Santa brought her a bag of kitty treats and catnip. She will be okay. She is lucky to still be around considering all the allergies we have going on at this house. It is only because of my love for her that she still remains. I am sure "Daddy Fred" wants her outta here. LOL!
We are having a family dinner at our home before we go to Oxford. They have decided yet again to have "party" food for Christmas. Not a real dinner. Chips and dip and meatballs. We didn't want to do that again so we decided to start our own family tradition. We will go down there after we have opened our gifts and eaten dinner.
Fred is excited about the gift that he has gotten for me. I can't wait to know what it is. I purchased the Kindle Fire for him. I hope he likes it. Especially since I bought it from Target. They are not that good about returns.
I am so blessed. I have my very own family. Two boys, A hubby and a super cat. What more can you ask for. I don't need anything else. What a great Christmas! This is the stuff people dream of having and God saw fit for me to have it. Thank you, Lord and Happy Birthday, Jesus. Thank you so much for what you did for a dying world. You came and saved us. Your precious blood redeemed us from the curse of death. Awesome stuff.
Health update:
I am still sore from Wednesdays workout. I didn't do anything today. I did a lot of cleaning, so I am going to count that as burning calories. Merry Christmas! I will write back in a few hours (hopefully before the 26th)
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Friday, December 23, 2011
Day 4
The gym door would not open. So, I went to Wal-Mart for fresh fruit instead. I guess I'll have to do a home workout.
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Day 2 and Day 3
Hello World,
Sorry that I didn't get to write yesterday for day 2. Man were we busy at the office. Anyway, I was asked to join the spin class at my gym. Of coarse you know I protested because I am so far out of shape but I went anyway. I made it through 45 minutes. It was great. I was very, very surprised that I still had it in me. It made for an easier day as well. I had more energy...
But today, Day 3, I was feeling it! My legs were like jelly when I woke up this morning and got on the elliptical machine. I felt every muscle in my body. Some I didn't know that I had. This morning, I completed 30 minutes on the elliptical. I came back home early because I felt like I needed to remove the bumpers on Nicholas' crib. I had them there to prevent him from getting his legs caught, but he is rolling from side to side now and I was just thinking all while I was at the gym that I needed to take care of that, so when my 30 minutes were up I headed home. The first thing I did was to remove them.
Still reading Fit for life. I have been reading about natural hygiene and the metabolic cycles of the body. It seems so logical. I have also been reading my scriptures and getting more understanding from the book of Proverbs. What a great week. Just like old times...
Sorry that I didn't get to write yesterday for day 2. Man were we busy at the office. Anyway, I was asked to join the spin class at my gym. Of coarse you know I protested because I am so far out of shape but I went anyway. I made it through 45 minutes. It was great. I was very, very surprised that I still had it in me. It made for an easier day as well. I had more energy...
But today, Day 3, I was feeling it! My legs were like jelly when I woke up this morning and got on the elliptical machine. I felt every muscle in my body. Some I didn't know that I had. This morning, I completed 30 minutes on the elliptical. I came back home early because I felt like I needed to remove the bumpers on Nicholas' crib. I had them there to prevent him from getting his legs caught, but he is rolling from side to side now and I was just thinking all while I was at the gym that I needed to take care of that, so when my 30 minutes were up I headed home. The first thing I did was to remove them.
Still reading Fit for life. I have been reading about natural hygiene and the metabolic cycles of the body. It seems so logical. I have also been reading my scriptures and getting more understanding from the book of Proverbs. What a great week. Just like old times...
Tuesday, December 20, 2011
Day 1 on December 20th. Brave Girl
Only five days before Christmas and I decide to take the plunge for preparation for my next run. I have decided to start with a 5k at the beginning of the year. I need to find one in the immediate area, but for now. I just need to start back walking.
This morning, I laced up my shoes and headed to the gym. I completed 30 minutes of walking and 15 minutes on the stationary bike. I read a few scriptures and came back home. I like to start with time. I think that is easier than how many miles at the beginning of my program. Anyway, how do I feel. IT WAS TOUGH! I felt like I was pulling 100 pounds of lead behind me. My back hurt and my legs felt like bricks. I was not flexible at all. Stiff can not even begin to describe my joints. Mentally, I felt great. The shame and fear of starting again left, the walls have started to shake. Down you go walls! Down you Go!
Personal goal: 3 weeks of walking. So, Wednesday January 11th. I hope to start the Couch to 5k program. One day at a time. I'll write later.
This morning, I laced up my shoes and headed to the gym. I completed 30 minutes of walking and 15 minutes on the stationary bike. I read a few scriptures and came back home. I like to start with time. I think that is easier than how many miles at the beginning of my program. Anyway, how do I feel. IT WAS TOUGH! I felt like I was pulling 100 pounds of lead behind me. My back hurt and my legs felt like bricks. I was not flexible at all. Stiff can not even begin to describe my joints. Mentally, I felt great. The shame and fear of starting again left, the walls have started to shake. Down you go walls! Down you Go!
Personal goal: 3 weeks of walking. So, Wednesday January 11th. I hope to start the Couch to 5k program. One day at a time. I'll write later.
Okay....the walls
Okay, I am ready to deal. I had a dear colleague-friend make me get real this week, along with Fred. I don't even think they realized the impact they both had on me this week. She (my colleague-friend) was just sharing a bit but Proverbs 25:11 came to mind as we ended our text conversation: A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. She hit the nail on the head. I knew I was ready to deal with my walls. Got home and was like..."I like my walls...they are great excuses right now." Fred immediately said, "Mia, let God get rid of those strongholds, let them go. You can't do it. Stop being controlling. Let them go."
I am back at square one because of some walls that were never TRULY torn down. I just read a few of my post from over the years. I thank God that I write because I can see where I have made mistakes (not just typos :-)). In December 2011, I can name the walls that I find my comfort. I realize that these walls are all deception and based out of fear, but definitely a way for me to keep going around the same circle thus preventing my progress. I have the safe walls or strongholds that I have allowed Satan to set up in my mind based on what was said or done to me: whether by my own hand or by the words or hands of others. I know that over my years of blogging that I have talked about them.
Here we go.... The first wall and probably the most stable wall is DISOBEDIENCE. I know what I should do, but use every excuse in the book to keep from doing what I know God wants me to do. Obedience is more important to God than sacrifice. He wants me to follow His commands. I know exactly what He wants me to do...slow down, take time to talk to Him by reading and studying His word on a regular basis. The bible tells us in Galatians chapter 5 to Walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. There is no way that I can do "this sin" or "that sin" if I am walking in the Spirit. To walk in the Spirit is to study the word, pray, meditate on the word of God, and being holy.
The second wall is shame. From the results of my disobedience comes shame. The embarrassment of what I did not do starts to take over. The shame of being back as square one. The shame of having to do it all again. It's like repeating the third grade in school. Everyone knows where you should be but you didn't do what you needed to do to get to where you should be.
The third wall is blame. This wall is used as an excuse. If I blame then, I will never have to take responsibility for what it is that I need to do. I can say, "I couldn't do this or that because I had to do this or find this or that or I lost my...".
The fourth wall is hiding or running from the truth or self deception. Whatever you want to call not dealing with what is really going on. I want to do everything, but deal with my issue. Later never comes and I hide in later.
I sabotage my own efforts to succeed out of plain old fashion fear of success, the comfort of the familiar and laziness. I use these four walls to go back to the "old me" so that I can do it all again and have the same problem never getting to the next level.
From these four walls are props or planks that hold the walls up to keep them from falling these include: staying too busy to take time for me, lack of forgiveness, disorganization, lack of patience, envy and selfishness.
That wasn't easy. That was not easy. That was difficult to do! But that is my truth for today. That's my truth.
I am back at square one because of some walls that were never TRULY torn down. I just read a few of my post from over the years. I thank God that I write because I can see where I have made mistakes (not just typos :-)). In December 2011, I can name the walls that I find my comfort. I realize that these walls are all deception and based out of fear, but definitely a way for me to keep going around the same circle thus preventing my progress. I have the safe walls or strongholds that I have allowed Satan to set up in my mind based on what was said or done to me: whether by my own hand or by the words or hands of others. I know that over my years of blogging that I have talked about them.
Here we go.... The first wall and probably the most stable wall is DISOBEDIENCE. I know what I should do, but use every excuse in the book to keep from doing what I know God wants me to do. Obedience is more important to God than sacrifice. He wants me to follow His commands. I know exactly what He wants me to do...slow down, take time to talk to Him by reading and studying His word on a regular basis. The bible tells us in Galatians chapter 5 to Walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. There is no way that I can do "this sin" or "that sin" if I am walking in the Spirit. To walk in the Spirit is to study the word, pray, meditate on the word of God, and being holy.
The second wall is shame. From the results of my disobedience comes shame. The embarrassment of what I did not do starts to take over. The shame of being back as square one. The shame of having to do it all again. It's like repeating the third grade in school. Everyone knows where you should be but you didn't do what you needed to do to get to where you should be.
The third wall is blame. This wall is used as an excuse. If I blame then, I will never have to take responsibility for what it is that I need to do. I can say, "I couldn't do this or that because I had to do this or find this or that or I lost my...".
The fourth wall is hiding or running from the truth or self deception. Whatever you want to call not dealing with what is really going on. I want to do everything, but deal with my issue. Later never comes and I hide in later.
I sabotage my own efforts to succeed out of plain old fashion fear of success, the comfort of the familiar and laziness. I use these four walls to go back to the "old me" so that I can do it all again and have the same problem never getting to the next level.
From these four walls are props or planks that hold the walls up to keep them from falling these include: staying too busy to take time for me, lack of forgiveness, disorganization, lack of patience, envy and selfishness.
That wasn't easy. That was not easy. That was difficult to do! But that is my truth for today. That's my truth.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Writers Block: A little update!
Hello World,
It has been a while. I have been suffering from writers block for over a month. Well, a lot has occurred. I realized that it is okay for me to give myself a little more time after the baby to get it together. I still need more time and he is 6 months old. I have been too hard on myself. I did not give myself a break. I have been rocking and rolling since May 27th of this year. Even on my six week maternity leave, my mind was racing. Trying to stay "perfect".
I recently realized that I have had a tough year emotionally. The loss of my aunt in the summer of 2010, my uncle and then my grandmother in 2011. Here are some of the big things from 2011: I had to basically start all over with everything after the birth of Nicholas, Lil Fred's language impairment was acknowledged and addressed, and the emotional changes Bug suffered from the realization of Nicholas' permanence in our family, helping Fred as he completes his senior year in school. Just trying to balance it all has been a challenge. But to sum it all up. It has been a great year. I have learned a lot about me and the strength of my immediate and extended family. I learned that there is a lot that I can do, but I also learned that I can't do it all and neither do I want to. I learned the importance of seeing people and empathizing with them but not to the point that I put my own needs aside. I learned the freedom of the word "No". Can I say it again, "No". People want what they want and will put you in a bind to get it, so, I learned this word this year, "No".
Through it all Fred and I have gotten closer to God. We did not leave His side. We learned more about Him and kept as close as we could to Him during these times and He has made a way for us.
Another thing, I wrote out my list of goals for 2012 as I do for every year. My list is so different for 2012. It is not about me. It's about the bigger picture of me. Its about me setting the same goals with a different motive. I also see what really matters...and they are in the pictures on your right and to your left.
Now about my health...
I have learned a lot more about the achievement of optimal health for the body. I am currently reading Fit for life, juicing a little and have taken a great liking to eating more live foods on a daily basis. I am waiting for the perfect day to go and exercise. Can you please tell me when things are going to be perfect enough for me to go? Anyway, that's another situation for another day. Today, I am appreciating what I have done correctly this year. I am finished sabotaging my efforts. I am truly going to stop trying to "fix" things on my own. Only God can help me get to where I need to go. Following Him is the only way to change permanently. I have always tried to do everything in my own strength and I am worn out. God wants me to prosper and be in good health even as my soul prospers. So that means I need to have my soul prosper. I have to let the blood that he shed take care of all of my needs. It's a different me, I surrender all.
It has been a while. I have been suffering from writers block for over a month. Well, a lot has occurred. I realized that it is okay for me to give myself a little more time after the baby to get it together. I still need more time and he is 6 months old. I have been too hard on myself. I did not give myself a break. I have been rocking and rolling since May 27th of this year. Even on my six week maternity leave, my mind was racing. Trying to stay "perfect".
I recently realized that I have had a tough year emotionally. The loss of my aunt in the summer of 2010, my uncle and then my grandmother in 2011. Here are some of the big things from 2011: I had to basically start all over with everything after the birth of Nicholas, Lil Fred's language impairment was acknowledged and addressed, and the emotional changes Bug suffered from the realization of Nicholas' permanence in our family, helping Fred as he completes his senior year in school. Just trying to balance it all has been a challenge. But to sum it all up. It has been a great year. I have learned a lot about me and the strength of my immediate and extended family. I learned that there is a lot that I can do, but I also learned that I can't do it all and neither do I want to. I learned the importance of seeing people and empathizing with them but not to the point that I put my own needs aside. I learned the freedom of the word "No". Can I say it again, "No". People want what they want and will put you in a bind to get it, so, I learned this word this year, "No".
Through it all Fred and I have gotten closer to God. We did not leave His side. We learned more about Him and kept as close as we could to Him during these times and He has made a way for us.
Another thing, I wrote out my list of goals for 2012 as I do for every year. My list is so different for 2012. It is not about me. It's about the bigger picture of me. Its about me setting the same goals with a different motive. I also see what really matters...and they are in the pictures on your right and to your left.
Now about my health...
I have learned a lot more about the achievement of optimal health for the body. I am currently reading Fit for life, juicing a little and have taken a great liking to eating more live foods on a daily basis. I am waiting for the perfect day to go and exercise. Can you please tell me when things are going to be perfect enough for me to go? Anyway, that's another situation for another day. Today, I am appreciating what I have done correctly this year. I am finished sabotaging my efforts. I am truly going to stop trying to "fix" things on my own. Only God can help me get to where I need to go. Following Him is the only way to change permanently. I have always tried to do everything in my own strength and I am worn out. God wants me to prosper and be in good health even as my soul prospers. So that means I need to have my soul prosper. I have to let the blood that he shed take care of all of my needs. It's a different me, I surrender all.
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November 2011