The Funeral

The day started okay in Oxford Saturday July 10th. I woke up and did a 3 mile walk in the neighborhood. I haven't walked that neighborhood in years (for exercise purposes).

After the walk, the family members began to wake up. Everyone was holding their own. No one was particularly sad looking. You could hear laughter and see smiles. I ate a breakfast of donuts (well, because they were there.) As a matter of fact, the whole house was a sweet addicts heaven. Anyway, I ended up leaving to go get a haircut from my husband's best friend. Fred and Lil Fred got haircuts too. While there, I talked with the best friend's wife who is a recovering food addict and is currently reaping the benefits of lapband surgery. She was telling me of her struggles as she works hard to reach her goals. I just went to talking....you can tell this is my passion. I could have talked and talked and talked to that girl for hours. Fred was in the barber's chair teasing me..."oh no, Mia is talking about food". He knows that I can go on and on with that subject! LOL!

After the haircuts, we went to my mother in laws. I started to feel heavy. I can't really explain the heaviness other than maybe the grief of my aunt's death was starting to set in. This was about 9am at this time. I asked my mother in law if she knew what time the funeral home opened so I could go an view the body before the funeral. She called the owner. Somehow my mother in law knows everyone in town.  So she had him to open the funeral home so that I can view the body. He was going to open up anyway, but she was able to get him to come a little early for me. Fred, Lil Fred and I went to the funeral home. I walked in. She looked absolutely beautiful. I hadn't seen her look that peaceful in a while. I had only recently seen her struggle in the last few weeks of her life. So it was good to see her look like her old self. The company did a great job. I didn't cry. I felt relieved at that time. Fred took me back to my aunt's house were the family was. We got back and everyone was slowly preparing for the service. Fred and I sat on the couch when my mom and Aunt Trina left to go to walmart. I also left with Fred to get earrings and he needed a few things as well. We spent too much time there. I think I did it on purpose. I was just stalling.

We got back to the house about about 10:30am. Family members started to arrive. The funeral home wanted us to start lining up at 1:15pm. I wasn't even dress and both bathrooms were tied up. I finally started to get Lil Fred and myself ready. It was time to put my shoes on. Were is my other shoe??? I left it on the bed at home in Southaven. WHAT AN IDIOT! It was 12:30pm and I didn't have shoes. All that time I had spent fooling around earlier. Going to the funeral home, being at my mother in laws,  and at wal-mart and once I got home I realized I should have been buying shoes while I was out. Anyway, my brother rushed me to payless to get some shoes. I picked the first pair I saw. I rushed back to the house to get ready.

Everyone was ready and the funeral directors wanted to have a family prayer. My dad prayed but I didn't get to hear it because Lil Fred had fallen asleep on the way back from payless and didn't wake up once we got back to the house. He began to snore really loudly during the prayer so I had to take him out to keep him from disturbing everyone. :(

Fred and I rode together and proceeded to the church with the family. I began to feel all hot and shaky. As we approached the church I began to cry, sobbing. I said loudly. "Fred, I am about to lose it!" He is so sweet. He held my hand and told me to get it together. I managed to pull it together to get in line to enter the church. As we waited outside. I began to cry again. We walked slowly into the church and I saw my aunt lying there in the coffin. I knew this would be the last time I would see her and I just wailed. Never has a funeral been this difficult for me. I guess because I knew her very well. I knew my grandparents, but not like I knew her. She made a doll for me that I still have to this day.

As the service went on, I began to find relief. The words of the pastor and remarks of the friends and classmates of my aunt were comforting. The heaviness finally lifted. We went to the burial site and laid my aunt to rest. The heaviness was gone. We went back to the church and had dinner. Afterwards the family met back at the house and just were together. We were together like we hadn't been for years. I hate that we had to come together because of a funeral, but I am glad we did come together. Aunt San would have loved to see everyone. But I guess she did...looking from Heaven.